I never feel like I fit in, and being back in Arkansas is no exception. I’ve had different life experiences from most of the people I meet, and I’m always reluctant to let my true colors shine forth (right away, anyway). So I decided to pen (well, type) a letter to any prospective friends I meet, letting them know who I am and what I’m about. Take me or leave me.

Dear Prospective Friend–

I’m glad to meet you. Since most of the people I went to high school with moved away, are losers, or are too busy for me, I’m glad to find a potential friend in you. Before we bond, there are a few things you should know about me. If you’re ok with all of them, let’s move forward in our friendship.

1. I’m not a volunteer or participating type of person. I will not be volunteering to drive the Kindergarten kids on a field trip. I won’t be baking them brownies. I definitely will not be joining PTA. I love my kid, but I just don’t like volunteering. (Plus a room full of kids makes me itch. Seriously)

2. I’m not blonde, perky, or fashionable. I have my moments with fashion but all in all, I don’t care if my nails are painted or if I have a stain on my shirt. Working at my friend’s pink store makes me realize how very non-pink I am. I feel like the harbinger of doom when I’m working just because so many damn blondes come in.

3. I’m Buddhist. So thanks for the invite, but I won’t be joining you for church service. This one (in my mind anyway) is hard for a lot of people here to get their heads around. But yes, I follow a religion that has been around far longer than Christianity and am hyper-sensitive about the possibility of being preached to.

4. I like weird food. I love sushi, thai food, korean barbecue. I’ll try most things. Fried catfish is not my idea of a top notch meal. I like 5 star restaurants and bisque and all manner of French food. Even escargots. But I can get down on some Mexican (and wow, is there a lot of that here).

5. I speak languages. I speak French and Spanish. I’ve traveled to Europe. I’d live there.

6. I like to drink. Wine, rum, whatever. I’m not an alcoholic or anything but I just thought you should know.

7. I cuss. Not in front of my son, but I do like to cuss when it’s fitting.

8. I’m separated(ish) from my husband. But you probably already know this because this is a small town, and apparently everyone already knows my story. But we’re trying to work things out so when you see us together it’s not for appearances (see #9). We really do like hanging out.

9. I’m not about keeping up appearances. I don’t (much) care what people think.  In high school I dyed my hair pink. I’m a little more conformist than I once was, but I definitely don’t do things so people will think highly of me.

10. I run a business from home. Another mind-blower for the Arkansas set. I run my marketing firm from home. I’ve done so for 3 years. I love it. I’m very career minded and love my business. Get me started talking about marketing and I won’t stop.

Aside from these quirks, I’m a loyal friend. I like going out, though haven’t done much of that lately. I love writing (obviously) and photography. I’m impatient and short tempered at times, but I’m also very giving to my friends. If you haven’t run screaming, let’s go out for wine.